I Don’t Get Wasted and I Don’t Do Drugs and That’s Not Allowed to Bother You

I blow bubbles, not smoke rings.

I blow bubbles, not smoke rings.

I’ve never done any drugs. This surprises a lot of people, given that I come from an upper-middle class liberal background and go to a small liberal arts school. I’m from Eugene, Oregon, hippie capital of the US, and go to Skidmore College, ranked number 1 for marijuana usage by the Princeton Review in 2015. I’m not saying I never will smoke pot, but I’ve never felt the need to. I’m aware that I’m part of the minority. I can count on one hand all the people I know who have never smoked weed. And that’s 100% okay with me.

Marijuana doesn’t bother me. High people don’t bother me. I have no problem whatsoever with people who smoke – that’s everyone’s personal decision and I have no opinion on marijuana usage. Smoke if you want to. Don’t smoke if you don’t want to. It really makes no difference to me.

So what’s this blog post about, then? If I have no problem with people who do drugs, what the hell am I writing about?

The problem I have with people who do drugs is that some of them feel they have the right to tell me I should do them. I have been told by multiple people on multiple occasions that they want to “corrupt” me. They think I’m “innocent” and “immature” for not doing drugs. I have had people roll their eyes at me when I said I don’t smoke. Someone once told me that she wouldn’t go out with me because I was sober. Another person joked that they would slip weed into some of my food since I wasn’t going to smoke on my own. People often tell me I’m “too sober” or “not drunk enough” when I go out. Just because I’m young and in college doesn’t mean I’m missing out by not partying more. I still go to parties and I get drunk, but that’s not enough for some people. For me, going out and having fun doesn’t mean I need to be under the influence; it’s about the people I’m with, the places I go, and honestly it’s about whether or not I get to dance.

People judge me for my choices and that’s not fair. I respect other people’s decisions to do drugs, to binge drink, to go hard. So other people need to respect my decision not to.

Peer pressure isn’t cool in middle school and it isn’t cool now. You can tell me I’m lame, you can tell me I’m boring, and you can tell me I’ll regret not being wilder when I’m older. But none of those things are true and I’m not going to change for you.

I didn’t drink until I was 17. I like to go out sober sometimes. I don’t smoke weed and I never have. I never drink enough to blackout or throw up. I’m perfectly happy staying in sometimes and not going out to bars. I’m a “good girl.” And that’s okay.


5 thoughts on “I Don’t Get Wasted and I Don’t Do Drugs and That’s Not Allowed to Bother You

  1. notyouraveragecollegegirlblog says:

    I’m the exact same way; never have I smoked nor do I drunk to the point that I don’t remember my night. I did that one time only and it was the worst experience ever; learned my lesson.

    Some of my “closest” friends have tried peer pressuring me into smoking weed, but I know what I want and that’s not it, so I never give in. But I totally agree that people should respect our decision to stay sober or not smoke. It’s disrespectful otherwise. Not everyone has the same way of enjoying a party or a get-together.

    I find it crazy that people “joked” with you about slipping drugs into your food. Like what the hell? That’s insane. Everyone should respect each other’s decisions and just live with it. If you don’t like it, don’t be around that person. End of story.

  2. jcolemarrow says:

    Loved this post! it’s so true though I never judge people for being drunk off their asses so what makes them think it’s ok to judge me for being sober?

  3. Sam Harris says:

    I started drinking less than a year ago…towards the end of junior year. Not that I had never drunk alcohol up to that point, but I had never gotten drunk, and could count the number of drinks I had had in college up to that point on one hand. I didn’t like alcohol, I didn’t want the feeling of being drunk. I also have fairly severe asthma, so I had never smoked, and intended never to smoke (or do any drugs, really).

    I got to Skidmore thinking that I would start drinking, and then I decided not to. The group of friends I had when I first got here were totally cool with me not doing any of that stuff, but they certainly indulged more than anyone I had ever hung out with before. Straight-egde me had somehow fallen into the stoner friend group. And I loved it. I had more fun than I had had in a while, I took care of them and trip-sat them during many of their experiences, and I hung out with them whenever they were getting high or drunk…while being completely sober.

    Things changed a bit towards the end of my first year. I began to drift apart from that friend group, which isn’t a surprise, as we were all just very different people. But I still wanted to be friends with them. However, my desire to stay connected to my friends changed dramatically during Fun Day of all times. Two of my best friends ran up to me and tried to shove a beer into my hand. They were blackout and belligerent and, for the first time throughout my entire year at Skidmore, gave me shit for not wanting to drink.

    To this day I’m not entirely sure if their dissatisfaction with my sobriety had been there the whole time, but I was so appalled that things were never the same between us.

    I’ve changed a lot over the last three and a half years. I do drink now and have gotten high a handful of times, but I do look back fondly on my sober days, and try to convince everyone that it’s alright not do anything they don’t want to do. Because hey, who am I to judge?

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